SHORT FEATURE: WAITING FOR GOBOTS

Like almost everyone else in the country ($100 million+ opening weekend? Really?), I saw Transformers: Age of Extinction for Aleteia this week. Is it bad? Of course. Will that stop it from being one of the highest grossing movies of the year? Not a chance.

You know who I always feel sorry for whenever a Transformers movie comes out? The GoBots. Technically, the much maligned machines preceded the Transformers, but their cartoon and toys were so inferior that it wasn’t long before they became a punch line. To add insult to injury, Hasbro bought the rights to the name in the early 90s and now GoBots are considered just a weird alternate reality in the Transformers universe. Still, that doesn’t mean the GoBots don’t have their fans, despite the existential angst which surely must accompany such a lonely devotion…

“There are no more Saturdays.” Sure, it’s a comedy bit, but that line still pretty much sums up one of the major Absurdist themes in the actual play, Waiting For Godot. A common interpretation of the ending of Beckett’s most famous work is that there is nothing waiting for us except death, and yet delusional people of faith continue to wait in vain for an imaginary afterlife spent with a non-existent God just because it gives an illusory meaning to our meaningless existence. Yeah, Absurdists aren’t exactly the most optimistic people on the planet.

As defined by Fr. John Hardon's Modern Catholic Dictionary, “An absurdist is one who positively affirms the absence of purpose in man's existence on earth. Linked to a denial of God's existence, Absurdism sees no finality at work in the universe and reduces all events in the world, including man's deepest thoughts and affections, to a blank irrationality.”

The thing with Absurdism is that it assumes we’re just making up the whole God thing in order to make ourselves feel better. As noted in the Catechism, however, the Church has always held that “God, the first principle and last end of all things, can be known with certainty from the created world by the natural light of human reason.” If you think that’s a stretch, then check out philosopher Peter Kreeft’s list of twenty arguments for the existence of God as derived from the natural world, it’s pretty impressive. Now it’s true that we can’t know everything about God through reason alone, some things require revelation, but we can at least know there is a God, and that by itself is enough to put a serious crimp in Absurdism. We ain’t just making it up. Which means it looks like there are gonna be more Saturdays after all.

PULP CATHOLICISM #074

THE B-LIST: QUESTIONABLE MUSICAL MOMENTS #18 – PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE

Typically I try to take in the #1 new release of the weekend for Aleteia, but when that movie was going to be Think Like A Man Too… I just couldn’t. Instead, for reasons I explain in my review, I decided to watch Jersey Boys instead. It’s not terrible, but not what I really wanted in a movie about early 60s music.

You know who had a pretty good handle on the music of that time period? Paul Williams. His parody of late 50s/early 60s pop from Phantom of the Paradise is spot on, mostly because he nails the music itself so authentically. Of course, his lyrics probably aren’t quite what you would expect to have heard coming out of your AM radio back then…

Phantom of the Paradise - Goodbye, Eddie, Goodbye from Vanderbeer on Vimeo.

Alright, so it’s a goofy song, but there’s actually an interesting moral and philosophical dilemma buried in the lyrics. As Fr. William Saunders notes, “Objectively, suicide is a mortal sin. (Moreover, to help someone commit suicide is also a mortal sin.) Here though we must remember that for a sin to be mortal and cost someone salvation, the objective action (in this case the taking of one's own life) must be grave or serious matter; the person must have an informed intellect (know that this is wrong); and the person must give full consent of the will (intend to commit this action).”

Based on those criteria alone, Eddie would definitely appear to be risking hell with his decision as he’s both informed AND consenting in his own demise. Now, of course, the Catechism qualifies things some by pointing out that “grave psychological disturbances, anguish, or grave fear of hardship, suffering, or torture can diminish the responsibility of the one committing suicide.” So, the fact that he’s being driven by the circumstances surrounding his little sisters health could possibly lessen Eddie’s culpability a little bit.

But what about the fact that Eddie is setting up his own death so that the profits from the resulting increase in record sales (a pretty common phenomena) can pay for his little sister’s life saving operation? Does his death still count as suicide under those circumstances, or does Eddie’s motivation move it into the realm of self sacrifice in order to save the life of another? After all, as we read in John 15:13 where it says, “No one can have greater love than to lay down his life for his friends,” God looks pretty favorably on such selfless actions.

Sadly, the answer is probably no. Though there appears to be nothing in the Catechism or anywhere else that directly addresses rock stars offing themselves to help out a sick sibling, we can extrapolate the likely solution from other Church teachings. For instance, in the document entitled Ethical and Religious Directives for Catholic Health Care Services released by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, it tells us that “the transplantation of organs from living donors is morally permissible when such a donation will not sacrifice or seriously impair any essential bodily function and the anticipated benefit to the recipient is proportionate to the harm done to the donor.” In other words, you can’t donate something needed by someone else if it might result in your own death. This position is derived from one of the core philosophical underpinnings of Christianity, the recognition that we are not to commit an evil act even if we expect something good may come of it.

So it would seem the best we can hope for Eddie in this scenario is that God takes pity on him by taking into account the mental anguish he was suffering due to the terminal illness of his sister. And considering that God is a pretty decent fellow, I’m pretty sure he will.

PULP CATHOLICISM #073

SHORT FEATURE – THE BEST DAD IN THE GALAXY

Over at Aleteia this past  weekend I took in How To Train Your Dragon 2. For reasons I get into during the review, I was kind of taken with the film’s depiction of Stoick and Hiccup’s father/son relationship. What can I say, I’m a sucker for stories with that kind of theme. After all, it’s not easy being a good dad. Even the best ones need advice every now and then…

You know who would have appreciated the last lesson on that list? G.K. Chesterton. He had a thing or two to say about the “monotony” of raising a child:

“Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always say, "Do it again"; and the grown-up person does it again until he is nearly dead. For grown-up people are not strong enough to exult in monotony. But perhaps God is strong enough to exult in monotony. It is possible that God says every morning, "Do it again" to the sun; and every evening, "Do it again" to the moon. It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike; it may be that God makes every daisy separately, but has never got tired of making them. It may be that He has the eternal appetite of infancy; for we have sinned and grown old, and our Father is younger than we.”

I hope all you dads out there who manage, like God, to get up and keep doing it again every day, had a happy Father’s Day. The galaxy is a better place for your efforts.

PULP CATHOLICISM #072

NOW SHOWING AT A BLOG NEAR YOU

Is it uncharitable to enjoy watching terrible things happen to a person? Because in Edge of Tomorrow, which I reviewed for Aleteia this week, Tom Cruise dies many horrible deaths, and I’ve gotta say, I really, really liked seeing it happen. Um, the rest of the movie is okay too. Honest, it’s not just because it caters to my lifelong distaste for its lead actor. Seriously.

Let’s move on, why don’t we? How about a romantic comedy centering on abortion? Doesn’t that sound like a fun night at the movies? The Crescat has gotten wind of Obvious Child, the new movie endorsed by Planned Parenthood and NARAL which follows “an aspiring young comedian, Donna Stern, whose abortion turns into a ‘happily ever after’ love story.” The Crescat’s reaction is about what you would expect.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, which is receiving a month long celebration over at Aspie Catholic. I’m afraid I missed out on the Bronies craze these past few years, but figured some of you out there might be interested. At any rate, it’s gotta be better than the abortion rom-com, right?

One craze I didn’t miss out on was Dungeons & Dragons back in the 80s. Remember all the satanic panic that surrounded the game? Well, it turns out some folks have gotten permission to make a live action version of Jack Chick’s infamous Dark Dungeons tract, and Think Christian has the details and the trailer.

Speaking of classics, Fr. Dwight Longenecker has finally discovered Alfred Hitchcock’s Rope, and likes what he sees. Slightly less classic and much less liked is Pretty Woman, which Elise Hilton at the Acton Institute believes is not really that pretty at all.

And finally, if you’re going to be hanging around the Vatican in a couple of weeks, be sure to check out the fifth edition of the International Catholic Film Festival which is being held from June 18th to the 24th.

That should keep you busy for now. See you soon.

PULP CATHOLICISM #071

SHORT FEATURE: FRACTURED FAIRY TALES – SLEEPING BEAUTY

Once upon a time there was a movie named Maleficent, and I reviewed it for Aleteia this week. We are not living happily ever after together. Angelina Jolie was good, but everything around her was plain awful. Of course, I might just be one of those idiot know-nothing movie critics, because a lot of folks over at IMDb seem to love it. So far. Oh well, it happens. For my tastes, if you’re going to try and turn a fairy tale on its head, this is the way you should go about it…

See, that’s how it’s done. As I noted in my review at Aleteia, one of Maleficent’s big takeaways is that the hearts of all mankind (emphasis on the man part) are consumed with greed. Well, this short implies the exact same thing, but does so in a light hearted way without tossing misguided nature worship and warmed over third wave feminism into the mix. Oh, and there’s no allegorical rape either.

Still, what does it matter if Disney has turned Sleeping Beauty into its own PG-rated version of I Spit On Your Grave? It’s just a kids movie right, just a modernized fairy tale? Well, as J. R. R. Tolkien suggested in his essay, On Fairy Stories, one of the important aspects of a true fairy tale is that, by the end of the story, no matter what tragedy has befallen the characters, the denouement reestablishes the moral order. Fanciful though they may be, fairy tales explain the real world to us and how it should be. Children may not be able to articulate this particular truth about such stories, but they inherently understand it.

And so does the writer of Maleficent. She basically has her narrator state that all the previous versions of the tale you’ve heard were a lie and now you’ll learn the true story. Tweaking the narrative wouldn’t really be a problem in and of itself, except that she goes one step further and changes the moral order the tale establishes at the end. You see, in the writer’s view of our universe, mankind is a blight on the natural world, all males are useless or evil, and most (if not all) women are victims of a cruel patriarchal society who need to rise up and seize control from their masculine overlords. That’s what she wants her fairy tale to explain to us about the real world.

Now, to be honest, this bleak world view isn’t overly blatant in the film. You can probably watch Maleficent and not be too bothered by it. But it’s definitely there if you take the time to think about it. That’s one of the reasons I believe there’s currently a disconnect between critics (which I suppose includes me) and general audiences over the film. Critics (in theory) try to consider such things while they’re watching a movie, and once you do think about Maleficent, it’s pretty hard to miss its underlying themes. Still, if you turn your brain off, it’s an okay fantasy movie. Who knows, it just might be the Mickey Mouse approved rape-revenge movie you never knew you wanted.