Friday, July 31, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 31, 2020

Alien Beach Party Massacre (1996) Extraterrestrials demand stoned surfers return their deadly soccer ball of mass destruction. Basically fodder for USA Up All Night. TIL: Because doing so tends to indiscriminately kill non-combatants, the Church typically opposes the use of WMDs.

Tinseltown Testaments: The Exorcist (1973) "The demon is a liar. He will lie to confuse us. But he will also mix lies with the truth to attack us. The attack is psychological, Damien, and powerful. So don't listen to him."

Dad Rock Diary: George Harrison - All Things Must Pass (1970) Sure six sides is overkill, but four sides of greatness is worth the unnecessary bloat. Laudable Lyrics: Forgive me Lord please, those years when I ignored you. Forgive them Lord, those that feel they can't afford you.

Thursday, July 30, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 30, 2020

Host (2020) Friends stuck at home during COVID-19 decide to have a seance on Zoom. Idiots. Nothing original, but unrelentingly creepy for its 59-minute run time. TIL: Although the Church allows for ghosts, it stresses that's almost never what answers when you call on spirits.

One Sheet Words of Wisdom: Eyes Without a Face (1960) "Prayer is practicing the knowledge of God’s eyes upon you. He is the only one who should act as your mirror." - Sally Read

Dad Rock Diary: Fifty Foot Hose - Cauldron (1968) Homemade synthesizers highlight this avant-garde experiment in psychdelia. Early Pink Floyd fans will approve. Laudable Lyrics: What direction do we go? What is right, what is wrong? There is no sleeping all night long.

Sunday, July 26, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 26, 2020

Shock Corridor (1963) Reporter undercover in an asylum starts to lose it. Supposed expose of mental health system quickly collapses into enjoyable exploitation. TIL:  Per St. Jerome's rule to aid the sick, Christian care for the mentally ill goes back to the first monasteries.

Dad Rock Diary: The Electric Prunes - Mass in F Minor (1968) David Axelrod and studio musicians get high and record a Latin mass. Certainly no worse than most new church music of the era. Laudable Lyrics: Pleni sunt coeli et terra gloria Tua. Osanna in excelsis.

And finally…

Saturday, July 25, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 25, 2020

Hyperspace (1984) Occasionally humorous Star Wars parody has Lord Buckethead invading Earth to harass a "was she ever this young" Paula Poundstone. TIL: Just war theory tends to frown on invading another country (or planet) for anything other than defense of oneself or another.

Still Voices - Beetlejuice (1988) "Another unsettling element in modern art is that common symptom of immaturity, the dread of doing what has been done before." - Edith Wharton

Dad Rock Diary: The Soft Machine - The Soft Machine (1968) Somewhat psychedelic jazz-pop breezily prepares the way for the band's more experimental fusion stuff to come. Excellent. Laudable Lyrics: Days go by, I watch the sky, my eyes forever quest.

Friday, July 24, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 24, 2020

Frankenstein and the Monster from Hell (1974) Final Frankie film from Hammer is mostly slow, but still a classy fond farewell to Cushing's classic character. TIL: Unlike God, Cushing's Frankenstein never loves his creations. Without that foundation, of course they always go bad.

Funny Book Philosophy: Jackie Gleason and The Honeymooners 008 (1957)

Dad Rock Daily: The Main Ingredient - Afrodisiac (1973) Mostly Stevie Wonder covers crafted for couples feeling chill after a few glasses of Golden Cadillac. Laudable Lyrics: Well I'd love to spend more time but I've got so many things to do. Oh, I, I've got work to do.

Thursday, July 23, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 23, 2020

Thunder of Gigantic Serpent (1988) Thugs pester annoying child causing her giant pet snake to wreck the city. Hong Kong needs to remain free to produce this kind of insanity. TIL: Sorry snake fans, the Bible has over 50 mentions of the little devils, almost none of them positive.

Dad Rock Diary: Tages - Studio (1967) Another buried gem of late 60's psychedelic pop waiting to be unearthed by treasure seekers. If only today's auto-tuned musicscape had as many. Laudable Lyrics: Have you seen your brother lately? Do you know him well?

Wednesday, July 22, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 22, 2020

Sea Fever (2019) Trawler becomes infested with strange contagious organism. Familiar story beats, but the moody performances keep things interesting. TIL: In the Old Testament, times of plague and sickness were always seen as opportunities for repentance and restoration.

One Sheet Words of Wisdom: Housekeeping (1987) "Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset." - Saint Francis de Sales

Dad Rock Diary: ESG - Come Away With ESG (1983) Four sisters plus four instruments equals endless infectious grooves and apparently an unlimited source of samples. Laudable Lyrics: Why do you lie? I say you, you, you make no sense at all.

Monday, July 20, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 20, 2020

Children Of The Night (1991) Vampires who barf up their lungs while napping besiege a small town. Oddball take on the mythos should please horrorphiles. TIL: JP II often talked of breathing with two lungs as a symbol for possible reunification of the Latin and Orthodox Churches.

Tinseltown Testaments: The Mission (1986) "God gave us the burden of freedom. You chose your crime. Do you have the courage to choose your penance? Do you dare do that?"

Dad Rock Diary: Quiet Riot - Metal Health (1983) Heavy Metal's first #1 album is no work of genius by any measure, but it hits the spot for those times when MTV nostalgia kicks in. Laudable Lyrics: So you say I got a funny face, I got no worries.

Sunday, July 19, 2020

SHORT FEATURE: THE THING THAT WOULDN'T LEAVE

"Manners are of more importance than laws." claimed Edmund Burke, "According to their quality, they aid morals, or they destroy them." Be that as it may, such sentiments mean nothing to ... The Thing That Wouldn't Leave!

Why bother with good manners, especially given the times we live in? Well, as journalist Henry Hazlitt once noted, “Manners are to morals as the final sand papering, rubbing, and polishing on a fine piece of furniture are to the selection of the wood, the sawing, chiseling, and fitting. They are the finishing touch.” Basically, good manners point to something deeper in a person's character.

And what would that be? Virtue. Temperance and charity are the respective cardinal and theological virtues which form the basis for good manners. Temperance ensures the will's mastery over instincts and keeps desires within the limits of what is honorable; charity ensures we love our neighbors as ourselves. So, in theory, good manners show your willingness to keep your reactions in check out of charitable love for others. In theory. Of course, you can fake manners like anything else. But if that's the case, that opints to something deeper as well, doesn't it?

Saturday, July 18, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 18, 2020

That Guy Dick Miller (2014) Chronicles the career of everyone's favorite character actor. If you're not happy every time Dick Miller shows up, we can't be friends. TIL: The Bible is full of walk-on characters, like the second thief on the cross, who make indelible impressions.

Dad Rock Diary: C.A. Quintet - Trip Thru Hell (1968) Psychedelic garage art rock? Interesting experiment highlights Hell on Earth before attempting to musically describe what is like to be lost in the flaming pits of perdition. Laudable Lyrics: Aieeeee! Aieeee! Aieeeeeeeee!!!

And finally, just in case you're not tired of reading about the effect of Tolkien's Catholicism on his writing, Anthony G. Cirilla has an article up at Speculative Faith on "Providence and Plot in Tolkien’s Hobbit."

Friday, July 17, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 17, 2020

The Hearse (1980) Woman returns to house where her aunt once worshiped Satan. Decent atmosphere, but tamer than most made-for-TV movies. TIL: As Exodus 20 notes, the sins of parents can affect a family for generations. That doesn't make them responsible for our sins though.

Still Voices - Project: Metalbeast (1995) “Careless shepherd make excellent dinner for wolf.” – Earl Derr Biggers

Dad Rock Diary: Sly & The Family Stone - Dance To The Music (1968) Probably not the group's masterpiece musically, but if you just want to feel good for awhile, look no further. Laudable Lyrics: Don't hate the black. Don't hate the white. If you get bit, just hate the bite.

Thursday, July 16, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 16, 2020

Hollow Gate (1988) Unlucky teens get trapped in a mad slasher's front yard. No, I'm not making that up. Look, the genre was drying up by this point, okay. TIL: Burying a St. Joseph statue in your yard for luck is superstition, don't do it; as part of a devotion, you're okay.

Funny Book Philosophy: Secret Origins 010 (1986)

Dad Rock Diary: The Lollipop Shoppe - Just Colour (1968) Obscure garage rock with a psychedelic twang. Deserves a little better than being consigned to one single on Nuggets. Laudable Lyrics: I'm lost in doubt. Oh dear god what's it all about. Don't close the door on me.

Sunday, July 12, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 12, 2020

Zombie Strippers! (2008) Dancers become more popular the deader they get. Robert Englund pays the rent in this abysmal attempt at a horror comedy. TIL: The dancers might be swell, but the act of stripping for strangers to incite lust and get their money is itself morally illicit.

Sing A New Song: Fiona Apple - Fetch The Bolt Cutters (2020) Well, someone obviously spent years dwelling on people who hurt her feelings. More empowering than whiny though. Laudable Lyrics: I thought being blacklisted would be grist for the mill until I realized I'm still here.

And finally…

Saturday, July 11, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 11, 2020

Billy Club (2013) Surprisingly watchable modern slasher features a killer umpire's revenge for a little league prank gone wrong. No one's used this mask before? TIL: Author Dave Armstrong notes that apologists for the Church, like umpires, can't worry about being too popular.

One Sheet Words of Wisdom: C.H.U.D. (1984) "The road to Easy Street goes through the sewer." - John Madden

Dad Rock Diary: Os Mutantes - Os Mutantes (1968) Even if you don't understand a word of Portuguese, this sun-drenched psychedelia from Brazil is guaranteed to make you smile anyway. Laudable Lyrics: I know with me everything is fine. It's time now to make up your mind.

Thursday, July 09, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 9, 2020

Jennifer on My Mind (1971) Aimless rich kid pursues drug-addled hippie chick. Not sure it's serious or trying to satirize Love Story, so let's call it a fail. TIL: A relationship should be morally helpful to both parties. One resembling Lou Reed's Berlin probably doesn't qualify.

Tinseltown Testaments: "I know now why my father resisted Scarabus, because he knew that one cannot fight evil by hiding from it. Men like Scarabus thrive on the apathy of others." - The Raven (1963)

Dad Rock Diary: Sonny Bono - Inner Views (1966) Typical hippy ramblings combined with Sonny's occasional whine grates, but the arrangements are superb and the whole thing grows on you. Laudable Lyrics: Much to my acute surprise, Sunday morning has still survived.

Tuesday, July 07, 2020

SHORT TAKE: WARRIOR NUN (SEASON 1)

First off, Netflix, if you’re going to title your show Warrior Nun, at least have the common courtesy to make your title character a nun. Keep her angsty teenage girl snarkiness to appeal to the CW crowd if you must, but out of respect for your audience, make your warrior nun a freaking nun. Or change the name to Warrior Angsty Snarky Teenage Girl Who’d Rather Die Than Be A Nun. One or the other, your choice.

Anyway, about the show. Very, very loosely based on the old 90’s comic book series Warrior Nun Areala, Netflix’s new series eschews most of the titillating nunsploitation elements of the source material and dives deep into the waters of YA fantasy wherein lies the likes of reluctant chosen ones, doe-eyed first loves, and the nigh unbearable wokeness of all things under twenty years of age.

It begins with Ava, our heroine, quite dead. When a battle between good and evil breaks out near her corpse, some actual warrior nuns decide to hide an angel’s halo inside Ava’s spine. This resurrects Ava and gives her super powers, which should make her THE warrior nun but, of course, Ava will have nothing to do with any of it. She goes on the run, eventually hooking up with an obligatory diverse crew of kids that includes the requisite trannie and a love interest who exhibits not a trace of toxic masculinity. Not one single lovable trace.

Alas, pursued by demons and an evil corporation (is there any other kind) who both want the halo for their own reasons, Ava is eventually forced to return to the nuns, who try to train her to be a Vatican-sponsored Buffy. Unfortunately, it looks like even the Church covets the halo for its own nefarious purposes, so Ava and a few righteous sisters are compelled to disaffiliate and fight for the truth on their own. Or so it seems.

The series’ saving grace is a final episode revelation that turns most of the preceding narrative on its head and piques enough curiosity to make the thought of watching the start of Season 2 (if there is one) bearable. It sure does take its sweet time getting there, though. For most of the first ten episodes it’s spotty writing, sketchy acting, generic action, and enough anti-Church drivel to last five seasons, much less one.

It’s silly, really. Warrior Nun is another one of those stories that despises the Church, but also couldn’t exist without it. Sort of like most atheists when you think about it. But much like many such young non-believers, the series hints that it may find its way back to the Church as it ages. We’ll see next season.

Sunday, July 05, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 5, 2020

The Dead Don’t Die (2019) Says nothing new about humanity's inevitable doom that most zombie films haven't already. Maybe that's part of the joke? TIL: Origen argued all will be saved; Augustine argued most will be damned. Basically, it's our choice who turns out to be right.

Still Voices - Hamilton (2020) "The praise of a civilized world is justly due to Christianity." - Alexander Hamilton

Dad Rock Diary: The Motels - All Four One (1982) An all around good collection of 80's new wave. Frustratingly, though, you still only remember the singles after it's done. Laudable Lyrics: Growing up has always been tough. Good intentions never good enough.

Friday, July 03, 2020

DAILY CALL SHEET: JULY 3, 2020

The War of the Roses (1989) As a couple's marriage disintegrates, battle lines are drawn over who gets the house. May be the most pitch black comedy ever. TIL: It says in Malachi, "For I hate divorce, says the Lord, the God of Israel." Even the lawyers do too by the end of this.

Funny Book Philosophy: Archie's Sonshine (1974)

Dad Rock Diary: Robert Plant - The Principle of Moments (1983) Spacious in feel and meditative in tone. Quite good once you accept it's not the Zeppelin you're looking for. Laudable Lyrics: Talk is cheap, but you're talking fast. Never take the time to think of where it will end.

Thursday, July 02, 2020

DAILY CAL SHEET: JULY 2, 2020

The Skull (1965) Despite Christopher Lee's warnings, Peter Cushing buys the Marquis de Sade's skull. Always listen to Christopher Lee. TIL: de Sade wasn't content with plain atheism, he wanted the total corruption of Christianity. He would have been right at home on the Internet.

Tinseltown Testaments: Night of the Scarecrow (1995) "The appearance of goodness is not always what it seems. The Scriptures warn us that beneath the shining skin of the ripe fruit lies pestilence, vermin, and rot."

Sing A New Song: Bob Dylan - Rough and Rowdy Ways (2020) A Dylan album where the best thing on it is his voice? Guess the times they really are a changin'. Laudable Lyrics: For thine is kingdom, the power, the glory. Go tell it on the mountain, go tell the real story.