Mysterious Island (1961) Chickens may not be the scariest monsters around, but they're pretty darn cool in Harryhausen's take on Jules Verne. TIL: In the Catholic Encyclopedia's opinion, Verne's work deserves commendations for containing nothing offensive to good taste or morals.
And, since it’s New Year’s Eve, here’s a little something from the archives that fits the day, and probably the times. BMC MOVIE OF THE WEEK: BLOODY NEW YEAR
The Demon Lover (1977) Beefy 70's metal dude from Michigan gets miffed that no one takes his Satanism seriously. Should appeal to fans of goofy regional horror. TIL: If this guy is representative of Satanism, no wonder Lavey was desperate to rebrand it as atheists doing cosplay.
Dad Rock Diary: Chase - Chase (1970) Starts with horns and Hammond a'blasting and never lets up. Excellent jazz-rock, though perhaps a tad bit too experimental for those looking for Chicago clones. Laudable Lyrics: Say your prayers, don't worry, things will turn out at right.
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964) So, all political leaders are self-serving buffoons? Genius comedy, but tell us something we don't know. TIL: The Catechism says we must treat those in authority with respect... insofar as it is deserved.
Funny Book Philosophy: All-Star Comics 022 (1944)
Dial Code Santa Claus (1989) The insane, brutal French version of Home Alone featuring a counterfeit killer Kris Kringle you never knew you wanted. TIL: The primary Patron Saint of children is, naturally, St. Nicholas of Myra, who never assaulted anyone except one dumb heretic.
One Sheet Words of Wisdom: The Hunters of the Golden Cobra (1982) "In everything we do, the serpent ego is rising up. We are glad that there are so many thorns on the path. They strike the hood of the cobra." - Swami Vivekananda
Gretel & Hansel (2020) Has its share of good creepy moments, but can feminist filmmakers find something else empowering besides witchcraft for a change? TIL: The original Grimm tales express a wholly Christian perspective which, honestly, is probably why they still resonate.
Meanwhile, over at America, Molly Cahill takes a look at how Pixar’s ‘Soul’ imagines life after death (and before birth), and how it contrasts with Catholic teaching has to say on the subject.
The Cleansing Hour (2019) Phony online exorcist finally meets the real thing. Great for his view count, but not so much for his health. Does okay with what it has to work with. TIL: Contrary to popular canards, neither God nor the devil require your belief to affect your life.
And for Christmas Day, here’s a little something from the archives, that time I felt strangely compelled to write a couple of thousand words about SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS and bad parenting.
Fortress (1992) Imprisoned for illegal pregnancy, Chris Lambert and wife must outwit Kurtwood Smith to escape. Good fun. TIL: "Be fruitful and multiply" is not binding upon every individual, but it is a general precept for humanity that no government should interfere with.
Dad Rock Diary: Meco - Christmas in the Stars (1980) More proof that hardcore Star Wars fans will happily suffer any indignity. Laudable Lyrics: "So what can you get a Wookiee for Christmas hen he already owns a comb? Let's give him love and understanding, good will to men."
Enemy Territory (1987) Ray Parker, Jr. helps some white guy escape from Tony Todd in the worst tenement on Earth. Surprisingly pretty darn fun. TIL: Dr. Kelly Scott Franklin's interesting take on the Nativity is that "Mary was the means Christ chose to invade enemy territory."
Still Voices - Ultra Q - Episode 3 (1965) "Wherever we go in the mountains, we find more than we seek." - John Muir
Notzilla (2019) Monster grows the more beer it drinks, as does the danger from its flammable flatulence. Lots of winks and nods to fans of old kaiju films. TIL: Credited with miraculously providing beer to thirsty pilgrims, St. Arnulf of Metz is the patron saint of the beverage.
Still Voices - Strange Brew (1983) “From man’s sweat and God’s love, beer came into the world.” - St. Arnulf of Metz
Real Men (1987) Macho super spy conscripts sensitive milquetoast to oppose Russian agents, fight clowns, and deliver a glass of water to aliens. Unjustly snubbed comedy. TIL: Real Catholic men emulate St. Joseph; protecting families, embracing work, and following the will of God.
And then there’s this interesting story from Aleteia. It turns out that, in a way, Monty Python was right. Blesses are the cheesemakers.
Freedom Strikes a Blow (1973) Fun flick is basically The Quiet Man, but with noticeably more kung-fu and a considerably higher body count. TIL: The Church would say there is no true freedom except in the service of what is good. Choosing to do evil leads to the slavery of sin.
And then there’s this. A post in the Catholic Movie Geeks Facebook group on Eiji Tsubaraya's conversion to Catholicism led to me searching out this little pop culture nugget entitled "The Crucifixion of Japan's Greatest Super Hero." Guess it's time to catch up on Ultraman Ace.
White Zombie (1932) Master mesmerizer Lugosi runs a zombie slave racket until a dame throws a wrench in the works. Stodgy, but classic. TIL: Since sin is committed by a free personal act of the individual will, zombies robbed of their free will aren't responsible for their sins.
Dad Rock Diary: The Doors - The Doors (1967) Admittedly, the band may have earned its love'em or hate'em status over time, but there's really no denying the impact of this dolorous debut. TIL: The time to hesitate is through, no time to wallow in the mire.
Dagora, the Space Monster (1964) Giant flying jellyfish eats Earth's coal supply. Sounds goofy, but the visuals get downright Lovecraftian at times. TIL: H.P.'s writings were all about discovering the true hidden nature of the world. Surprisingly religious for an avowed atheist.
And then there’s this story over at Religion News Service about an online reading of the Book of Job. What’s notable is the casting. Bill Murray as Job? No surprise really. After all, the man's sister is a Dominican nun who does a little acting herself now and then.
Scary Movie (1991) Nervous nerd worries a real killer is inside his town's annual haunt. Oozes Halloween. Even Halloween didn't have this much Halloween in it. TIL: Some variation of the phrase "Be not afraid." appears over a hundred times in the Bible. Maybe that's important.
Dad Rock Diary: Jethro Tull - A Passion Play (1973) Difficult to decipher morality tale for Prog Rock disciples. Laymen may wonder what the heck is going on. Laudable Lyrics: Son of Man, buy the flame of ever-life (yours to breathe and breath the pain of living)... living BE!
Stay Tuned (1992) Irate spouses get trapped inside Hell's TV programs. Pick any network to make a joke here, they all work. TIL: Well, the 1958 encyclical Miranda Prorsus did warn that TV's influence, good and bad, on the spiritual, intellectual and moral life was incalculable.
Dad Rock Diary: Pink Floyd - Obscured By Clouds (1972) Neglected soundtrack to forgotten hippie-flick just might have you playing it over and over again if you give it the chance. Laudable Lyrics: The memories of a man in his old age Are the deeds of a man in his prime.
Porno (2019) Not as naughty as it thinks horror-comedy has teens tired of being lectured about religion unwittingly summoning a demon when they rebel and watch a film they shouldn't. TIL: Well, not much need to add any extra religious commentary to that summary is there?
Blood Rage (1987) Evil twin slices more than turkey breast at Thanksgiving. Super gory slasher that, if nothing else, is worth it for Louise Lasser's unhinged performance. TIL: God doesn't need or get anything out of our thanks and praise, but giving it absolutely changes us.
And as a public service...
Rock 'n' Roll High School (1979) P.J. Soles leads a student rebellion against her school's Ramones-hating principal. Utterly ridiculous and so much better than it has any right to be. TIL: Not exactly a rock star, but Pope John Paul II managed to release two multi-platinum CDs.
Still Voices - Killer Tongue (1996) "Violence of the tongue is very real - sharper than any knife, wounding and creating bitterness that only the grace of God can heal." - St. Teresa of Calcutta
Alice Cooper: The Nightmare (1975) The godfather of shock rock brings his act to TV. Further proof the boob tube was way more interesting in the 70's. TIL: “Even when I wasn’t Christian, I was saying that. God and the Devil. Don’t pick the Devil. It’s a bad idea.” - Alice Cooper
Dad Rock Diary: Yes - 90125 (1983) It eschews the band's progressive roots and leans into the corporate, but get over that and it actually holds up really well as a piece of 80's radio-ready rock. Laudable Lyrics: When we reach, we believe in eternity. I believe in eternity.
And finally, since it's World Toilet Day, be sure to read up on The Stufetta of Cardinal Bibbiena, the infamous bathroom on the third floor of the Apostolic Palace in Vatican City known for its elaborate frescoes with mythological scenes painted by none other than the Raphael school.
Sudden Death (1995) Peter Hyam's hostage thriller features Van Damme locked in mortal combat with a penguin mascot. That's sort of required viewing, right? TIL: 2 Timothy mentions being hostage to the devil, which means being so influenced by him that you comply with his will.
Dad Rock Diary: Spirit - The Family That Plays Together (1968) Yet another excellent eclectic jazz-tinted psych album with a hit single that's arguably its weakest track. Gets bonus points for the OG Psalm 133. Laudable Lyrics: Hineh Mah tov umah na'im shevet achim gam yachad.
Car Wash (1976) A day with crazy customers and crew. Above average as "hang-out" movies go. Could use more Richard Pryor, but what couldn't? TIL: Lots of ritual washing in the Bible, but the phrase “cleanliness is next to godliness” is actually from a 1778 sermon by John Wesley.
Sing A New Song: AC/DC - Power Up (2020) Remember the nervous breakdown the entire planet had when New Coke came out? Some formulas don't need changing and AC/DC knows it. Keep on rocking, lads. Laudable Lyrics: Crystal balls and an almanac; she gonna take you to hell and back.
The Most Dangerous Game (1932) Castaways find themselves hunted by a sociopathic sportsman. The original in its genre and still one of the best. TIL: Brought to fervid faith after encountering a stag with a crucifix between its antlers, Hubert is now the patron Saint of hunters.
Dad Rock Diary: New Order - Power, Corruption And Lies (1983) So, you thought synthesizers in the 80's were all about pep and pop? Poor deluded fools. Even the fastest songs here are somber and downbeat. Laudable Lyrics: Everybody makes mistakes, even me. Just be free.
Cats (2019) That blubbering noise you make when you wiggle your finger up and down between your lips. That's it. That's my whole review. TIL: Catholic liturgical drama started around the 10th century, though it wasn't part of mass and sure as heck didn't look anything like this.
Funny Book Philosophy: All-Star Comics 016 (1943)
Dad Rock Diary: Elvis Presley - Aloha From Hawaii Via Satellite (1973) Maybe not his best live material (except for maybe An American Trilogy) but something about the totality of it all just really works. Laudable Lyrics: Glory, glory hallelujah! His truth is marching on.
The Intruder Within (1981) TV flick with great cast tries to do Alien on an oil rig and manages a pretty decent job given its budgetary limitations. TIL: While not a binding teaching, avid environmentalist Pope Francis suggests Catholics avoid fossil fuel-related investments.
Dad Rock Diary: Psychic TV - Dreams Less Sweet (1983) Schizophrenic mix of industrial, psych-pop, and hymnody might put some off for sure, but is just right for those who like the eclectic. Laudable Lyrics: And in the morning, after the night, I fall in love with the light.
And finally…
