Blood Sisters (1987) Sorority riles ghosts in a deserted brothel. Roberta Findlay again proves a woman can direct exploitative schlock as well as any man. TIL: The first continually operating school for girls in the US was New Orleans' nun-run Ursuline Academy, founded in 1727.
And then there’s this…
Big Trouble in Little China (1986) Bumbling trucker bothers a centuries-old evil sorcerer. Endlessly quotable Shaw Brothers homage from John Carpenter. TIL: Nestorians reached China first, but Christianity made few inroads there until Roman Catholic missionaries arrived in 1294.
Tinseltown Testaments: Big Trouble in Little China (1986) "A brave man likes the feel of nature on his face, Jack." "Yeah, and a wise man has enough sense to get in out of the rain!"
Mirror Mirror 2: Raven Dance (1994) Possessed mirror from Part 1 returns to trouble a Church-run orphanage while babyface Mark Ruffalo mumbles his lines. TIL: The Book of James compares hearing God's word and ignoring it to turning away from a mirror and forgetting your own face.
Funny Book Philosophy: Superboy And The Legion Of Super-Heroes 213 (1975) A little Last Supper done Legion-style.
Blood Quantum (2019) Native Americans immune to a zombie virus are hassled by dead white men. Clever colonization analogy, fair action. TIL: The 1537 papal bull Sublimis Deus declared that native people "discovered" by Christians were not to be deprived of liberty or property.
Dad Rock Diary: Walter Egan - Fundamental Roll (1977) Gets a nice boost from producers/backup musicians Buckingham & Nicks, but overall it's just inoffensively average pop. Laudable Lyrics: I gave my love and I gave my best. God only knows how good it felt to try.
Crawlspace (1986) Nobody creeps better than Klaus Kinski. This time he's a voyeuristic Nazi landlord. So, pretty much right up his alley. TIL: Kinski once put on a one-man stage show depicting Jesus as a hippie anarchist. The audience revolted, the police were called. Look it up.
Still Voices - Idiocracy (2006) "Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other." - Ann Landers
Wicked Stepmother (1989) Mother/daughter witches use a shared body to take over a family. Probably not the film Bette Davis was hoping to go out on. TIL: The 4th commandment binds stepparents to the same obligations as parents, such as not trying to ensorcell or kill your kids.
Dad Rock Diary: Free - Tons of Sobs (1968) Underappreciated touchstone in the heavy blues rock timeline. Not bad for a band that is just getting started. Laudable Lyrics: The trees hold their arms out to catch what life gives, but the people try to snatch all there is.
The Day of the Triffids (1962) Blinded by a meteor shower, humanity becomes lunch for giant man-eating plants. Enjoyable mix of goofy effects and bleak critique of society. TIL: It's likely Adam and Eve ate nothing but plants before the fall. They just weren't obnoxious about it.
Tinseltown Testaments: Incredibles 2 (2018) “You want to get out of the hole? First you’re going to have to put down the shovel.”
Monster Island (2019) Onetime Academy Award nominee Eric Roberts pretends to care while a Starro wannabee fights a giant rock. Yeah, no nomination this time. TIL: The only island mentioned in the OT is Arvad. No monsters, but the Knights Templar did hang out there for awhile.
One Sheet Words of Wisdom: The Cameraman (1928) "All photographs are accurate. None of them is the truth." - Richard Avedon
City of the Vampires (1993) Mulleted mook battles bloodsuckers while searching for his girlfriend. Standard SOV fare somewhat elevated by knockoff John Carpenter music. TIL: Music is a gift from God "in Whom is the harmony of the most perfect concord and the most perfect order."
Dad Rock Diary: Flash - Flash (1972) Starts off like The Who trying to sound like Yes but eventually settles into its own particular Prog Rock groove. Laudable Lyrics: Don't think you're getting nowhere, you know we all must start from very small beginnings, off to a better part.
Sunshine (2007) Astronauts undertake a one-way trip to reignite the dying sun. Great visuals, amazing score, and beaucoup religious subtext. TIL: Author Sam Guzman suggests that until we can explain what we believe deeply enough to die for, we can't know what we are living for.
Still Voices - The Conjuring 2 (2016) “In my experience, when we surrender all to the greatest Artist, that Artist fills us with the Spirit and makes us even more creative and aware of the greater reality all about us." - Makoto Fujimura
Cocoon (1985) Geezers get back their get-up-and-go after swimming in an alien's pool. A bit saccharine but the elderly cast is irresistible. TIL: Deuteronomy notes that when Moses died at the age of 120, his natural vigor (bodily juices) had not dried up. Umm... you go, Moses?
Funny Book Philosophy: Master Comics 087 (1948)
Patrick (1978) Creepy telekinetic teen doesn't let a coma stop his murderous ways. Somewhat slow, but overall effective Ozploitation. TIL: Aquinas believed the soul 'might' have a weak natural ability to remotely cause physical effects. If so, the usual ethics of its use apply.
Dad Rock Diary: The Simon Sisters - Winkin', Blinkin' and Nod (1964) Folk fluff, but if you gotta know what Carly Simon was up to before the hits, sure. Laudable Lyrics: When I look for my Lord I don't look where it's still, don't go to the valley below, I go up on a windy hill.
Black Moon Rising (1986) Tommy Lee Jones & Linda Hamilton carjack a poor man's K.I.T.T. to flee Robert Vaughn. Mid-tier 80's action, but still 80's action. TIL: Scripture says no man knows the time, yet every time a "black moon" occurs someone says it's a sign of the Apocalypse.
And now…
Shark Exorcist (2015) Priest battles demon shark and its possessed bite victim. Dreadful. What pathological condition forces me to watch these SyFy things? TIL: Demons rarely do animal possession. See the disastrous results when Legion entered a herd of pigs for one reason why.
Still Voices - The Screaming Skull (1958) "The skull has had a place in the history of art since the earliest dawning of human expression, as a reminder to appreciate the gift of life." - Noah Scalin
The Unholy (2021) Evil spirit poses as the Virgin Mary to steal the souls of the faithful. Not as sacrilegious as it sounds, but sinfully dull. TIL: Actually, less than 20 apparitions have Church approval. Dozens of others have been denied approval or outright condemned as false.
Dad Rock Diary: Killing Joke - Killing Joke (1980) Overrated? You decide, but there's a good reason all the metal/punk/industrial bands you like have this album in their collection. Laudable Lyrics: Mutant thought of bad mouthed news. It's just another birth of distorted views.
Ghost Voyage (2008) Assorted nogoodniks awaken on a spook-infested ship and must obey the rules or go to hell. Dull movie with bad take on Purgatory. TIL: The commemoration of the faithful departed during All Souls Day includes those in Purgatory as they are going to Heaven too.
Now Showing At a Blog Near You: Catholic Skywalker chimes in with his take on the latest iteration of Dune.