Sunday, December 08, 2013


Not Coming To A Theater Near You

“Believing in God, the only One, and loving him with all our being has enormous consequences for our whole life.” the Catechism tells us. “It means living in thanksgiving: if God is the only One, everything we are and have comes from him.” And sometimes his generosity is overwhelming.

You see, my love for pooping on the 2010 film Legion is well known around these parts, so you can imagine my reaction when the SyFy channel announced it was considering a weekly series based on the film. Well, according to Entertainment Weekly, it’s happening.

The network’s version is called Dominion (working title) and will be based on characters from the film. Official description: “Dominion is an epic supernatural drama set in the year 25 A.E. In this transformed post–apocalyptic future an army of lower angels, assembled by the archangel Gabriel, has waged a war of possession against mankind. The archangel Michael, turning against his own kind, has chosen to side with humanity against Gabriel. Rising out of the ashes of the 25 year-long battle are newly fortified cities which protect the human survivors. In Vega (formerly Las Vegas), the largest of these cities, two houses vie for control and the stage is set for political upheaval and a dangerous power shift. Meanwhile, a rebellious young soldier begins a perilous journey as the war between the human race and the fallen angels hell-bent on their domination escalates.”

Even from that brief description, the opportunities to poop on this show seem endless! But I’d best not waste it all on Dominion because it just might have some stiff competition from a new show The History Channel is developing. If is correct…

The History Channel is finalizing deals for the project, from feature writer Scott Kosar (The Machinist) and producers Eli Roth (the Hostel franchise) and Eric Newman (The Thing). Titled The Lost Years, the drama explores the undocumented years of Jesus’ life as a young adult… The Lost Years is based on an original idea by Kosar who developed it with Roth and Newman. All three have strong horror pedigree — Kosar co-wrote The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Amityville Horror and The Crazies, and Roth and Newman jointly produced The Last Exorcism franchise in addition to their other horror credits. That is not a coincidence — nor is Roth and Newman’s exorcism connection. I hear that The Lost Years was conceived in the horror genre, and it explores a theory about Jesus’ origins as an exorcist.

Oh, that sounds like a good idea, right? As I asked of our reader (and sometimes contributor) Xena when she brought this to my attention, what was the History Channel thinking? “We broke ratings records by producing a mini-series that was goofy, but generally reverent to the world's largest religion. I'm sure all of those same people will tune in again if we make something that craps all over their beliefs, right? It stars that same Jesus character, after all!” Amazing.

Bless us, Oh Lord, and these thy gifts! You love the little bloggers so much you have given them two shows to poop upon! "What shall I render to the LORD for all his bounty to me?"


Scott W. said...

I can check Legion free from my local library.

Still not worth it.

EegahInc said...

I'm guessing that means somebody donated it to the library, which would mean they probably picked it up for $5 bucks at Walmart and still didn't think it was worth keeping.