Wednesday, May 20, 2009

SHORT FEATURE: ATHLETES’ WIVES GONE WILD

While doing a little research for the upcoming review of Gymkata (Tell me, what sane person researches Gymkata?), I got curious about whatever happened to the movie’s star, Kurt Thomas. Turns out that after being inducted into the International Gymnastics Hall of Fame, Kurt and his wife opened up the successful Kurt Thomas Gymnastics Training Center in Texas. Good for him. Other athletes… well, their private lives haven’t gone as well.

A couple of thoughts come to mind after watching this video.

One: If, like myself, you had no idea who Anna Benson was before seeing this, and you feel compelled to Google her… might I suggest leaving Safe Search on.

Two: This illustrates yet another reason Protestants should have held onto those deuterocanonical books. I’d venture a guess that these guys would have really benefited from a heaping dose of Sirach before walking down the aisle. “An evil wife is an ox yoke which chafes; taking hold of her is like grasping a scorpion. There is great anger when a wife is drunken; she will not hide her shame. A wife's harlotry shows in her lustful eyes, and she is known by her eyelids… [however] A wife's charm delights her husband, and her skill puts fat on his bones. A silent wife is a gift of the Lord, and there is nothing so precious as a disciplined soul. A modest wife adds charm to charm, and no balance can weigh the value of a chaste soul. Like the sun rising in the heights of the Lord, so is the beauty of a good wife in her well-ordered home. Like the shining lamp on the holy lampstand, so is a beautiful face on a stately figure. Like pillars of gold on a base of silver, so are beautiful feet with a steadfast heart.”

Now, not to worry, ladies, while Sirach is definitely considered an inspired book, stuff like the being silent isn’t necessarily to be taken literally in every instance. And that being the case, it’s probably not a good idea for all you guys out there to keep pointing out such verses to your wife or girlfriend. (Trust me, I learned this firsthand as a teenager.) It’s like the introduction to the Book of Sirach in The Catholic Youth Bible says, “In interpreting Sirach, you must take special care not to conclude that women are the source of most of men’s troubles!” Good advice. Still, is it just me, or does the use of the word “most” make it seem like the editors are implying “some”?

1 comment:

Franky Fasano said...

If your actually looking for pictures of athletes wives I found this site called http://www.athleteswives.com. They let you rate all the wives and you can see where everyone ranks.